Finding My Way to You
by Elizabeth Scarlette
Summary: A different twist on the cliched AU Rachel is in foster care and finds Shelby story. If you liked You and I, I am sure you will like this too. Please Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

**Rachel's POV:**

The door opened slowly as the young girl hid behind the well-dressed woman standing in front of her. "Good morning Mrs. Johnson," the social worker stated as she looked into the elderly woman's face.

"Hello dear, is this little Rachel?" the older woman asked as she tried to peek around the social worker.

"Yes ma'am," the woman shuffled the thirteen year old girl around her, "Say hello Rachel."

"Hello," the girl whispered.

"Hello, would you like to come inside?" Figuring that she really had no choice in the matter, Rachel walked into the house and followed Mrs. Johnson in the "grand tour". "Here is your room dear." The room was nice with dark wooded furniture and a white blanket draped across the bed.

"Thank you, it's very nice," the girl mumbled.

"Come on, Rachel, let's go get your stuff," the social worker led Rachel out of the room and out to the car as she reminded her that she had school the next day. "They have an excellent glee club, you like to sing don't you?"

"Yes ma'am," the young girl stated. The social worker quickly left and it was just Rachel and Mrs. Johnson.

"Would you like to help me make dinner dear?" the elderly woman asked, wanting to ensure that Rachel felt like a part of the family.

"Actually, if it's all the same to you, I would like to get unpacked and settled in before dinner," the girl replied meekly hoping that it would be ok.

"That's fine dear, I'll call you when it's ready."

Rachel made a quick work of separating everything and finding a place for it. Finally she pulled out her little jewelry box that she had managed to keep out of the way of the many other orphans who had tried to steal it. Opening the box, Rachel slid out the small picture she had stared at for many hours since the day her dads had died. It was a picture of the backside on a woman as she looked out the large window that used to be in her house. The woman was holding her stomach. But it wasn't just any woman, she was Rachel's mom. The only living family member who may want her even the slightest bit. Kissing it softly, Rachel placed the only thing she had left from her old life under her pillow.

Dinner was a quiet affair until Rachel got up the courage to ask the question that had been nagging at her the whole time. "Are you married?"

Mrs. Johnson chuckled. "Yes his name is Frank. He is a doctor and wasn't supposed to work tonight but he was called in, so you'll meet him tomorrow."

"Ok." Rachel helped clean up the dishes and after saying goodnight went up to bed. When she curled up under the covers she took out her mother's picture. "Please come find me mommy. I need you. Please." Only letting a few tears stream down her cheeks, Rachel drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

**Shelby's POV:**

_Good morning_

_Wake up to a brand new day_

_This morning_

**SMACK!**

Shelby Corcoran smacked her alarm and stretched before turning over her shoulder to look at her lover sleeping next to her. His gorgeously toned, dark-skinned back contrasted beautifully with their white sheets and she took a second to marvel at how in the world she could have ever done anything in her life to deserve the amazing man sleeping beside her. Gently brushing her lips over his shoulder blade, she climbed over him and lay in front of him waiting for him to wake. After a few seconds of waiting, she leaned forward and kissed his chest… nothing. She then attempted the clichéd kiss to the lips…. Nothing. She sighed and sunk back into the mattress. Suddenly Shelby was being pushed into the mattress as her boyfriend of nearly five years hovered above her, smiling wickedly before leaning down and placing a long, loving, and wet kiss to her neck, making her body shiver with pleasure.

"Must you be naked when you wake me up when we have somewhere to go and no time to waste?" he groaned into her skin.

"I don't think having sex or making love or whatever you want to call it is a waste of time."

"I don't think so either but we don't have enough time to do it properly."

"Who said anything about propriety? We haven't ever been proper about our love-making before. Remember the janitor's closet? And if I do recall, Benjamin Montgomery, that was your idea." She quirked an eyebrow at him and he chuckled.

"One time! I pull you into a closet one time and you won't let me forget about it!"

"Nope," she pulled his face down to her and kissed him fully, letting her tongue enter his mouth and explore the familiar and yet still amazing territory. "Come shower with me?" she asked against his lips.

"Could I ever turn you down?" she scrunched her nose and shook her head before flipping him over. Forty-five minutes later she was drying her hair and he was getting dressed, both rushing due to their unexpected activities in the shower. Walking out of the house they locked the door, kissed each other goodbye, and got into their separate cars. Even though they both worked at Carmel they had decided early on that this 'take your own car to work' thing was a good idea. First of all, Shelby would occasionally be at school until eight with Vocal Adrenaline and also it would be good for them not to be together all of the time, they already worked and lived together.

Shelby walked into the school ready to meet her new students. She was the show choir director (which met in eighth period), separate voice and dance lesson teacher (second, third, fourth, and fifth periods), an English two AP teacher (sixth period) and had two off periods (first [which was shared with Benny] and seventh).

In all honesty, Shelby was pumped. She loved to teach and she loved helping her students achieve their dreams. She smiled inwardly thinking of one of her favorite students who had just started her freshman year at NYU. She had called Shelby last night and they had spent nearly three hours on the phone, just talking. Suddenly the bell rang and Shelby cursed inwardly as she ran to retrieve her roster for homeroom (which only met on the first day of school). When she finally returned to her class nearly everyone was there. Right before the tardy bell rang a petite girl ran into the room and sat in the very back. There was something about the girl that made Shelby do a double take. She looked so familiar but where had she seen her? When the bell rang she began her usual "Welcome back to school" lecture.

"Good morning! I hope you all had a wonderful summer! This year is going to be great at Carmel. Let's start with the announcements. For all of you drama kids, the theatre department will be putting on the dramatic play "I Never Saw Another Butterfly" by Raspanti. And for all of you Broadway dreamers, Vocal Adrenaline is having auditions in the auditorium tomorrow and Thursday from 3 until 6. Bring clothes to work out in and be ready to work. It's a lot of it but it is so much fun in the long run. Now shall we take attendance? Please say here when I say your name."

"Balazi, Melanie?"

"Here!"

"Bammon, Dalton?"

"Here!"

"Baron, Chad?"

"Here!"

"B-" Shelby stopped as she read the name. No! it couldn't be! It just couldn't! But could it? "Berry… Rachel?"

"Here!" came a strong voice and Shelby looked up to find it coming from the petite girl who had walked into the class right before the bell. The resemblance of this girl to her own reflection that she had seen this morning hit her like a ton of bricks. Quickly she continued calling the roll, as she tried not to stare at the young girl. After taking role she sent a text to Ben

_Hey Baby, can you come to my office for first? Please?_

_Shelby_

Benjamin smiled as he saw that he had a text from Shelby but that smile faded as he read the message. She never used the words baby and please in the same sentence, hell she never used the word please at all, unless she was upset.

When Shelby's phone buzzed she refused to look at it until the students were gone knowing that he had asked if she was ok, and if she read that she would break down and Shelby Corcoran does not cry!

**A/N: So I hope you liked this.**

**Ok so I read this article about sleeping patterns and how they reveal things about you and I saw that it says if couples sleep back to back then that means that they are both independent, comfortable with each other, and trust each other with their relationship. It then proceeded to say and I quote "if a couple sleeps with their bottoms touching it shows a deep sexual bond." (Which I thought was a bit strange.) And then it said that if they slept with their feet touching that it showed a deep emotional bond. This (all three) is how I imagine Shelby and Benny's relationship and so that is how I imagined them sleeping. Which is why, if anyone was wondering, though I doubt anyone was, why they were sleeping back to back instead of cuddling like most fanfiction couples (including my own).**

**and before anyone asks**

**1.) yes Shelby's boyfriend is supposed to be Taye-like**

**2.) I did take liberty and change Shelby's character to make her a bit less cold though she is still fiercely independent (though at the end she did show a need for Benny but I mean under the circumstances it's reasonable. Benny is the only person she trusts to talk to like that and understands that she must talk to someone if she wants to survive, which will be explained later.)**

**3.) yes Shelby's boyfriend's name Benny is a reference to RENT**

**Lizzy**

**PLEASE REVIEW 3 PLEASE REVIEW 3 PLEASE REVIEW 3 PLEASE REVIEW3 PLEASE REVIEW 3 PLEASE!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Oh my goodness guys! I am blown away! 27 reviews for one chapter! You have no idea how thankful I am! Thank you soooooo much! I hope you guys continue responding this much!**

**Oh and by the way I got a twitter especially for fanfiction because I want to be able to talk to you guys and ask your opinions on stuff going on in the stories all at one time :) so please follow me at LizzyScarlette and if you don't have a twitter, as I did not until now, you can text "follow LizzyScarlette" to 40404 and it will send you text messages! Ok so maybe I'm the only one who thinks that's cool but I think it is haha :) **

**Anyway! Onward to the story!**

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Benny burst into the room and quickly shut the door behind him as he made his way to the love of his life who was currently sobbing into her desk having not noticed his entrance. "Babe?" he questioned as he stroked her hair. She slowly stood up and leaned into his chest as she tucked her head under his chin and clung to him. "Shhhh…. Baby, what's wrong?"

"R-R-Rachel."

"What about her, sweetheart?" His girlfriend's daughter was no secret to him and he knew how much pain anything having to do with Rachel caused her. Running his fingers through her hair he tried to calm her down enough to where she could tell him.

"S-s-she's h-here."

"What?" he asked, all of the shock radiating through his voice. It was clear that he had not been expecting that.

"She was in my homeroom class, I saw her! Her name was Rachel Berry and she looked just like me! You can't tell me that it's a coincidence!"

"I wasn't going to Babe," he whispered into her ear as he kissed her head. "What are you going to do?"

"How in the hell am I supposed to know that?" Shelby yelled as she pushed him away, not necessarily mad at him but rather mad at herself for needing him.

"I don't know, Shell."

She turned and looked at his hurt expression and the anger written on her face dissolved into guilt and almost pure misery. She hung her head slightly, "I'm sorry babe, I just-"

"It's ok, I understand. You need time alone." He began to walk out of the room but she caught his arm before he left.

"Are you mad at me?" she asked as she looked into his eyes trying to read his thoughts.

He sighed and kissed her gently, "No, like I said, I understand. I'm just trying to help."

"I know you are, I'm sorry." he kissed her forehead as he moved a piece of her hair around her ear.

"I'll see you in lunch." With another kiss to her forehead he was gone, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

**Rachel's POV:**

Rachel rushed to get from class to class but Carmel was a huge school and she was completely lost. The bell rang and Rachel was in the idle of the hallway. Finally she found the room she had been looking for and opened it, timidly walking in. "Miss Berry I assume?" the teacher asked harshly.

"Yes ma'am."

"You're late," the teacher snapped making the entire class jump.

"I'm sorry I just couldn't find my way an-"

"Detention!"

"But-"

"Do you want me to make it two days, Miss Berry?"

"No ma'am," the girl looked down at her feet for a moment before raising her head defiantly though she would take her punishment.

"Today after school. Be here."

"Ye ma'am." Rachel took the only seat left open in the front row. Of course she would have to sit by one of the most attractive guys that she had ever seen right after he had just witnessed her first time ever getting in trouble at school.

"Hey, I'm Brody," he whispered to her. "She's a bit harsh."

"You think?" she asked as he chuckled.

"Now, why exactly were you late?"

"I couldn't find it," she mumbled.

"Well then!" he stated as if he had just thought of the cure for cancer. "I guess you just got yourself an escort for the rest of the day!"

"W-what?" she stumbled. Did this amazingly hot guy want to escort her around? Was this some sort of joke? "Is this some sort of joke?" Crap! She didn't mean for it to come out that nasty.

He merely chuckled again. "Ouch! If you don't want me to, I don't have to. I just thought I would be helpful."

"No I want you to… erm I mean that's fine. It's just no one's ever really tried to be my friend before."

"Really?" he asked suddenly feeling sympathetic towards her though he hardly knew why **he** had said anything to her. She does dress a bit odd and she seems fiercely determined, which might scare other guys away, but to him it just made her more of a challenge. Not to mention the fact that she didn't fall all over him.

"Yeah," she looked down, "I wouldn't fault you if you changed your mind." He placed his hand over hers and both were shocked at the comfort it held for both of them.

"I won't. You're stuck with me." She smiled at him slightly.

Brody surprised her by walking her to every class and being there when she got out. Finally lunch time rolled around and he gave her no choice, only pulled her to the table he and his friends were sitting at. After lunch he walked her to her sixth period and then left.

Rachel walked into the room and stared. That was the same teacher she had this morning for home room. There was something very familiar about her but Rachel couldn't put her finger on it. The teacher looked up and made eye contact with Rachel only for both of them to turn and look away.

The rest of the day passed by uneventfully and Rachel soon found herself being escorted to detention. "Thank you so much for helping me the rest of the day."

"You're welcome, wouldn't want you to get another detention." Rachel chuckled slightly and wondered what her foster parents would say. "Well, I will see you tomorrow, Rachel, meet me at the flagpole in the morning?"

"Yeah sure," she smiled giddily trying hard not to blush.

"Here," he wrote his phone number down on her arm. "Text me or something ok?"

"Ok."

"Now I have to get to practice. Bye!"

Rachel walked into the room to find the teacher packing up her bags. "I've had a family emergency, you will have to serve you detention with another teacher." Rachel merely nodded her head trying to not show her excitement of getting out of having to spend the next hour with this woman. "Follow me." The teacher locked the door and then walked to the auditorium. "Shelby?" the teacher called to the woman sitting at the director's table.

"Start warming up," the woman 'Shelby' barked into the microphone before standing up and sweetly smiling at them. Suddenly all of the blood drained from her face. "Um… hi."

"Hey, Shelby, here is the girl. Her name is Rachel Berry. She has to stay for an hour. Thanks again Shelby."

"You're welcome," Shelby mumbled as she tried to regain her composure. "Here you can sit here with me." She motioned to the chair next to hers and Rachel sat. Were the fates trying to throw them together? "Get going! First number!"

"I thought you said that Vocal Adrenaline has auditions this week," Rachel asked, feeling oddly comfortable with the woman she had just met.

"They do but first timers don't go to sectionals."

"Oh."

"What did you get busted for?" Shelby tried to ask nonchalantly.

"I got lost and was late to class," the girl's eyes shifted downward in embarrassment.

"What?" Shelby nearly yelled, taking Rachel aback. "She gave you detention on the first day….. for being late."

Rachel shrugged though she knew she was just as mad about it. Silence overcame the pair as both stared intently at the group on stage. "Ooh," Rachel cringed calling Shelby's attention.

"What?" the woman asked slightly amused at the face Rachel wascurrently making.

"Did you not-" Rachel stopped herself, this was the only teacher who had treated her with respect all day, she didn't want to be rude. "Nevermind."

"No really, What's wrong?" Shelby asked starting to wonder what could have made her daughter look so disgusted "I won't get mad I promise.

"Well that verse was completely flat."

Shelby sighed, leaning back in her seat. "Don't I know it? I worked on it with her with this all summer."

"Well why not have someone else do it?" Rachel.

"You are only allowed to have one female singer and she does the other two songs amazingly."

"Can't anyone else do just as good?" Rachel asked staring at the woman beside her secretly begging her to let her do it.

"No one on the team."

Rachel was silent and they resumed their quiet critiques. "I'm thinking about auditioning. I know I'm new to town and all but would it be ok with you if I did?" Rachel was surprised to see a mega-watt smile spread across Shelby's face.

"Of course that would be ok with me!"

The rest of the hour went by smoothly, with the two girls chatting and critiquing as Vocal Adrenaline worked their butts off on the stage.

Soon Rachel was walking home smiling at the strange turn of events that had taken place after school. She was going to audition. She knew she was going to make it. And she was going to be popular! The mere thought made Rachel's heart explode.

"Rachel?" a man's voice called as she entered the house.

"Yes sir?" she called back cheerfully having missed the anger in the older man's voice.

"Why are you so late?" he asked as she approached him. _This is really not how I would have liked to meet my new Foster father,_ Rachel thought as she took in his angered face.

"I'm sorry. My teacher was being ridiculous and gave me a detention. I had to stay after school."

"We DO NOT call adults ridiculous in this house!" he roared and it took all of Rachel's acting skills to not flinch.

"Yes sir."

"Now as punishment you are to go take a shower and go to bed."

"May I get dinner first?" she asked already feeling her stomach growl just a little.

"No." and with that he walked out of the room.

A very stunned Rachel walked up the stairs and did as she was told. Only when she had curled in her bed did she take out the picture and let a few tears fall down her cheek. "Goodnight, Mom. I love you."

**Shelby's POV:**

A few hours later in a house not too far from Rachel, Shelby took out the sonogram picture from under her pillow. "Goodnight, Baby. I love you." she gently kissed the picture before tucking it back into the pillowcase. She smiled as Benny let out a soft snore, flopped on his stomach and threw his arm over her pulling her into him where his nose was buried in her hair and her cheek was tickled by his soft breath. "Goodnight to you too, babe," she laughed, painfully unaware of her daughter's sorrow only a few miles away.

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**A/N: Once again I would like to thank all of you so much for responding the way that you did! Please continue to review! It really makes my week I'm not even kidding! **

**Lizzy**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**(and don't forget to follow :))**


	3. Chapter 3

Shelby awakened to the broad expanse of _**her**_ Benny's chest (it was moments like this in their relationship where the term boyfriend did not even begin to describe how much he meant to her). She felt his fingers tracing up and down her spine through her thin shirt, and could hear him humming some song. The moment was perfect, well except for the nagging guilt she felt in her chest. "I'm sorry for how I treated you yesterday," she mumbled into his shirt and was graced with the rumbling feeling of his chest against her cheek.

"Good morning to you too, Miss Corcoran," he mumbled against her head. "And don't apologize anymore. You did enough of that last night." She lifted her gaze to meet his and chuckled at his waggling eyebrows. "Are you going to be ok today?" he asked his tone serious as his gaze bore into her soul.

Smiling sadly, she nodded. "I should be, but if I'm not-"

"You have me," he concluded. Leaning her forehead against his chest, she sighed deeply.

"What did I ever do to deserve you?" the question was left hanging in the air as lips met lips and chest pressed against chest, body against body and tongue against tongue igniting the conflagration that was the passion that existed in their relationship.

**Rachel:**

Rachel woke to a grumbling in her stomach. Despite popular belief, Rachel Berry is not anorexic, she actually enjoys food very much. The only reason why she is so small is due to her strict workout routine. At that moment, though, her body was yelling for her to feed it, almost to the point of her being sick.

After dragging herself out of bed, Rachel walked down the stairs to find her foster mother in the kitchen. "Good morning dear."

"Good morning," Rachel replied tightly sitting at the seat that Mrs. Johnson had motioned was hers. When she had finished her breakfast, she tentatively asked the question that had been haunting her all morning, "Um, Vocal Adrenaline is having auditions today after school and I was wondering if I could go?"

"Sure dear," the woman nodded without even looking up. "Have a nice day at school."

"You too," Rachel returned not even bothering to notice the inadequateness of her statement.

When she arrived at the school she found Brody waiting for her. "Hey Rach!" he reached out and hugged her making her blush at both the contact and the nickname.

"Hi."

"Did you have a good night?" he asked seemingly interested in whether or not she really did have a good night.

"Yes," Rachel lied. What else was she supposed to say? _No I had an awful night crying to the mother that I've never met because she didn't want me, all because my foster father sent me to bed at five in the afternoon without dinner? _ No thank you. She would rather Brody stay interested in her for at least a little while longer.

Rachel pretended not to notice whenever Brody would nudge her elbow with his, seeming to think that it was just an accident. Around the tenth time she turned and looked at him, only to see his gaze locked on the teacher in front of him. The only tell-tale sign that he knew what he was doing was the smirk that spread across his face. "I know that my devilish good looks make it impossible for you to think, but you do really need to pay attention," he whispered, giving her a wink to let her know he wasn't serious.

The day went by uneventfully, except for the essay she had to write for English on what her heart truly desires. Miss Corcoran's instructions had been to write from the heart. "Don't worry," she had said, "No one will read them except for me." Pushing her plans for her essay aside Rachel continued to stretch before the auditions began.

"Rach!" She turned at the sound and saw Brody headed towards her in his full official VA workout outfit.

"You're on Vocal Adrenaline?" Rachel asked, surprised that this jock-looking guy could sing, or had any interest in it for that matter.

"Yeah, I'm the lead."

"But I was in here yesterday and-"

"Some sophomore fell and broke his ankle yesterday walking into practice, so I took him to the hospital." Rachel's face changed from one of total confusion, to one of total understanding. "Are you auditioning?"

"Duh," she chuckled, leaning down to stretch her hamstrings. "Now go away I need to finish stretching and focusing before Miss Corcoran gets here."

"Yes ma'am!" he saluted and marched off, but what Rachel didn't notice was that he was practically drooling over her as he did.

**Shelby:**

"Benny, I have to go," she moaned as his lips ran up and down the column of her neck.

"Why?" he whined as he continued placing heated kisses to her neck in the spot that he knew drove her wild before pulling her lips to his in a passionate kiss.

The couple didn't even notice that the door to the classroom was open until some jerk of a kid shouted into the room, "SELLOUTS!" and took off running.

"Benny!" Shelby squeaked as she wrapped her hand around his bicep and tried to pull him back to her. "Benny, it's not worth it. He's not worth it."

"Did you hear what he just called us?" he roared, making her shrink back slightly, but she was Shelby Corcoran and hell if she wasn't stubborn.

"Of course I did Benny! I'm not deaf!" dealing with racist remarks like that was not new to the couple. "He was just ignorant." Benny gently took his arm away from her and sank down in his chair, resting his elbows on the desk and his face in his palms.

"I'm beginning to think most of the world is ignorant."

"Babe-"

"You need to go to auditions, Shel." He stated with his face still in his hands.

"No, Benny, I'm not leaving you like this."

"We can talk about it at home, but you need to go." Still he would not look at her.

"Ok," he had given her space the day before, she would give it to him then. Placing a soft kiss on the back of his bald head, she whispered, "I love you," and went on her way to auditions.

**Rachel:**

She had totally passed the dancing portion of the audition, now it was the singing aspect. It wasn't necessarily singing that made her nervous at this moment, it was the fact that she was a bit intimidated. All of Vocal Adrenaline, plus all the hopefuls, plus one Shelby Corcoran equals one intimidating crowd.

"Hi, I'm Rachel Berry and I will be singing 'Don't Rain on My Parade.'"

**A/N: So that's the end of Chapter 3! Next chapter will be Shelby's thoughts on Rachel's performance, and Shelby and Benny's night, and maybe some from Rachel but I'm not really sure yet.**

**As all of you who read ****You and I**** know, I am a hopeless romantic so this story with definitely have a lot of it. Though this story is going to be Rachel and Shelby, Benny is a VERY important character so he will be in here just as much as them. I guess the point of this tangent is that this is a Rachel/Shelby/Benny story. **

**Please Review!**

**Lizzy**

**PLEASE REVIEW**


	4. Chapter 4

Rachel's voice filled the room taking everyone's breath away. Including her mother's. Shelby had always prided herself on keeping up a show face in the presence of her students. To never let them know just how good they are so they wouldn't get cocky. This was different though. Her daughter….. _her daughter_ had the voice of an angel. Shelby let a few tears slide down her face. Her baby had really gotten something from her. The best part of her.

"That was beautiful, Rachel. Simply beautiful," Shelby praised as the girl stepped off the stage causing all of VA to turn and look at their coach questioningly.

"Thank you." the girl humbly stated as she took her seat beside Brody.

Shelby gave them a glare as she saw him grab her hand. That boy had a reputation of leading girls on, only to break their hearts. Not that the poor boy (or girls for that matter) could help it. But still, Shelby decided to make a point of having a talk with him, tomorrow morning when there would be no chance of her catching them.

Soon the auditions were over and she was headed home, praying softly that Benny would be better, or at least willing to talk. Walking into the house she heard his music blaring through the floor and sighed. He was working out. He always did that when he was especially angry about something. He would hole up in their little gym in the basement and work out until it was all he could do to take a shower and crawl into bed. She did the same thing but not quite to the same extent.

She dropped her bags at the door and began her descent down the stairs. She stopped for a moment, admiring the way the muscles of his back rippled as her ran on the treadmill. Walking over to the music box, she turned it down, "Babe?" he was silent as he continued running for a moment before stopping it and sitting down, running a towel across his face. "Hey," she pulled his face to look up at her. "what's really wrong?"

"It's stupid. I'm a man and I'm acting like a girl." She scoffed and began to sit in his lap but he stopped her. "I'm sweaty and gross."

"Like I care." She sat straddling his lap so she could look straight into his eyes. "And it's not stupid. Please tell me."

He sighed deeply. "I just don't understand you know?" she nodded her head. "I just- I don't know."

"I don't know why they have to be like that either. But I do know that I love you." she kissed his lips and gently lifted herself off of his lap. "Now come on. Let's go get you a shower. I can already see you're at your limit." She linked their fingers and pulled him up the stairs. After she had forced him into the shower alone, she changed and crawled into his side of their bed.

"Hey! That's my side!" he laughed as he saw her with the covers pulled up to her nose, only her eyes and forehead visible.

"We can share," she piped and he chuckled more as he turned to get his clothes out of the dresser. Unknowingly, he dropped the towel from around his waist. "Eep! How dare you expose me to nudity! I thought you cared about me but now it's apparent that your intentions are to demoralize me!" she threw the covers over her head to conceal the smile that had broken out on her face, and the slight blush. A squeak of surprise escaped her lips as she felt the weight of his body land on hers. Suddenly he pulled the covers off her face, kissing her fiercely.

"No, my love, I believe it is your body which demoralizes me."

"Yeah, I know! Janitor's closet, remember?" he rolled his eyes and started to roll off of her but she stopped him. "Hey, for the record, that…. In the janitor's closet, that was pretty hot." He smiled and rolled off of her and under the covers, thankful that he had already put on his clothes.

He kissed her sweetly and pulled her to him, "Despite how much I would love to elongate this encounter, I am so tired that I don't think I can."

She chuckled, "that's ok."

"How did auditions go?"

"Oh it was amazing," she gushed, burying her face ever deeper into his chest.

"I take it Rachel can sing?" he laughed taking joy in her happiness.

"Like an angel. Benny?"

"Hmm?" he mumbled half-asleep.

"Never mind I'll ask you some other time. You're too asleep right now."

"Mmm'kay sor-" his sentence was disrupted by a snore which only made her laugh.

"'Night, Babe."

**Rachel:**

After rehearsal had let out, Brody, still holding Rachel's hand, walked her out the door. "Are your parents coming to get you?"

"They're not my parents!" Rachel snapped, and then blushed from guilt and embarrassment. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Who are they then?" she mumbled something but he could not hear her. "Come again?"

"My foster parents."

"Oh," he looked at her gently and anger flared up within her. She did not need his pity. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine. It's just I don't like people calling them my parents. I'm sorry for shouting; there was no way you could have known." Despite her words, her tone was cold.

"That's fine. So are they coming to get you?"

"No I'm just going to walk. It's not that far and- What are you doing?" she asked incredulously as he held the passenger door to his car open.

"I'll take you home."

"You don't have to do-" a crack of thunder resounded in the distance, "Are you sure?"

He laughed loudly, "Yes I'm sure now get in."

She did so and the ride was silent except for her instructions. "Thank you for driving me," she stated as she climbed out of his car.

"Anytime. Text me if you ever need a ride in the morning."

"Be careful what you ask for, I might be obliged to take you up on it."

He laughed heartily. What was it about this girl that made him want to laugh at every single moment? "That's why I offered, for you to take me up on it."

"Ok, well-"

"RACHEL BERRY!" Mr. Johnson yelled from the front porch.

Brody took notice of her slight wince, no matter how much she tried to hide it. "I'll be right there," she called, "I better go bye-"

"Are you ok, Rach?" he asked grabbing her hand.

"Yeah, but I have to go." He tried to ignore the nagging feeling that she was lying and tried to believe her but as he drove away he became more and more unsure of how safe it was for her for him to believe her.

Rachel walked to the front porch and came face to face with a very angry Foster father. "What did I tell you about informing me of your whereabouts? Did you get another detention?"

"No sir," she had learned long ago to never back-talk an adult. Sure she had had some nice foster parents but not all of them had been too keen with her. "I tried out for the glee club. I told Mrs. Johnson this morning."

"You were supposed to tell me. Now since it is your second offense you will lose both dinner and breakfast. I hope you had a hearty lunch. I will be here in the morning to make sure of its happening. Now go."

"Yes sir." She began up the stairs before turning back to him. "I have auditions after school tomorrow."

"No you don't."

"But if I don't go-"

"You should have thought about that before! No go!" he roared.

Silently Rachel decided that she would go, no matter what he said. On their deathbeds her father's had told her to follow her dreams. Glee was a stepping stone to that. She _had _to be in it. She _had_ to make them proud. "Please, momma, come get me." Rachel whispered before climbing into bed for a very long night.

**A/N: I hope you liked this! please let me know!**

**Lizzy**

**PLEASE REVIEW**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: hey guys! Terribly sorry to get this up late but im currently working on a show and Thursday was my sister's birthday add those to home work and you have yourself a jam packed Thursday…. So anyway I hope you guys like this.**

**Also I would like to say thank you to all of you lovely reviewers! Please keep it up!**

Rachel stumbled into the school, ten minutes late, weak from her walk and her hunger among other things. She shook her head trying to clear her vision so she could find a water fountain. She stumbled though. Closing her eyes in full expectation to hit the ground, Rachel was surprised to fall, not into a hard cold surface, but into a warm body. She inhaled the sweet scent of the person before realizing that they had asked her a question.

"Rachel, are you ok, baby?" Shelby silently cursed her mouth for letting the endearment slip, and her hand for brushing the girl's hair behind her ear.

"Yeah… I'm fine… just a bit hungry," she mumbled, still leaning into the woman as she tried to regain her balance.

"You must be really hungry if it's effecting how you walk," the concern in the woman's voice did not go unnoticed by Rachel.

"I fell asleep early last night and skipped dinner. Then I woke up late this morning and couldn't get breakfast." Rachel wondered why she felt so bad for lying to this woman, and why all she wanted was another hug.

"Honey, you really need to eat," Shelby stated, slightly wondering at her new-found motherly tone.

"I'll eat at lunch and be fine."

"No, you'll eat now. Come with me." Shelby wound her arm around the girl's waist and pulled her close to "lead" her to her office. Really she just wanted to hold her daughter close to her. Once they had entered the office, Shelby gave the girl the oatmeal and toast that she had originally made for herself.

"No, Miss Corcoran, I can't eat your food."

"Please just eat it Rachel. It really is no problem."

"Yes ma'am." Rachel ate in silence and Shelby watched as her daughter scarfed down the food as if she hadn't eaten in a while. When she had finished Shelby took in her daughter's almost sickly look.

"Rachel, are you feeling ok?"

"Yeah," Rachel lied, but when the teacher raised her eyebrow, she rushed to tell the truth. "I mean I'm not 100% but I will be ok." Shelby wrote Rachel a pass but right before the girl walked out of the office, she stopped and turned back to the woman currently sitting at her desk watching her intensely.

"Did you need something else Rach?"

"No, it's stupid," Rachel remarked as she went to leave

"What is it?"

"Well," Rachel began as she played with a strand of hair. A trait that Shelby noticed the girl had received from her. "I was just wondering if I could have a hug, I mean I know you probably think it's weird I just really…" Shelby already had her arms wrapped around the girl as she held her close, "need one." They stood like that for a moment before Shelby knew she had better pull away. "Thank you." and with that, the girl was off to her class.

Shelby was about to walk to Benny's class when Brody burst into her room looking worried.

"Miss Corcoran! Can I talk to you? It's important." The boy sat down across from Shelby but stood up quickly and began pacing the room.

"Um… Sure." Another thing Shelby Corcoran prided herself in was being a person who her students could and would come to if they ever had a problem.

"Ok… so I met this girl. She's really sweet and I really care about her. Well I found out last night that she is in foster care. I would have never guessed but she is! Anyway her foster parents didn't even come pick her up after auditions yesterday. They were making her walk! I mean it wouldn't be so bad if they lived right down the street, but they live like ten minutes away by car! So I drove her home. And then when we get there she is getting out of the car, being all polite and saying 'thank you' when her foster father steps out on the porch and yells her name like 'RACHEL BERRY!' then she winced. She tried not to show it but it got through. And it wasn't one of those uh-oh I'm going to get lectured winces. It was a uh-oh I'm going to be in big trouble winces. Then I asked her if she was ok. She just lied through her teeth and said yes but I could tell it was a lie. Then she isn't in first period this morning!"

"Rachel's in foster care?" Shelby's mind was going ninety miles an hour but was registering nothing.

"Yes! And I don't think that she is very safe."

Shelby gained her composure as best as she could. "Ok, well she was just in here. I sent her to class so go back and talk to her. But don't push the issue, just be a friend. Let her know that she can talk to me or you if she needs to. But if she tells you anything you had better tell me."

"Yes ma'am," he stated as he sprinted out the door.

The woman sat in concentration so deep she hardly noticed that the bell had rung.

When Rachel's English class rolled around, it took all she had not to hold her daughter and ask her why she was in foster care and why no one had notified her.

Shelby decided to start grading papers, and due to the fact that the newest members of the team had not been able to change their schedules yet, she gave her kids eighth off. After reading all of the papers (some shockingly poor and some shockingly good in their adequacy) she got to the one she had wanted to read the entire time.

_What I Want Most in the World_

_By Rachel Berry_

_What do I want most in the world? Well I want a lot of things. I want to make it on Broadway. I want to have a recording contract. I want to get two Tony awards. But what I want most? I want my mom. _

_You see, (and please don't judge me for this) I had two gay dads. I loved them more than anything in the world and they loved me back with all of their hearts. Well of course I had to have had a mother, and I did…. Biologically at least. I have never met her. And while I always loved my dads to death, I always wanted her around. Of course, at first it was a selfish need to be normal at least somewhat, but then I began to really want her for the relationship._

_I want to have her here to hold me when I wake up crying because I miss my dads or when I don't feel good. I want to help her paint her nails and have her do mine as we talk and laugh about nothing in particular. I want to have someone who just loves me because I'm me. Someone who I feel one hundred percent comfortable with. Someone who I can come home to or who comes home to me. Someone who will watch movies, even ones she hates, with me when I can't sleep. Someone to sing me to sleep. Someone who will scratch my back to get me to go to sleep like my dads used to. Someone to hug me when I just need a hug._

_All-in-all, I just want my mom._

Shelby leaned her head onto her desk and cried. Out of sorrow. Our of joy. Out of every emotion she could possibly have. Her baby wanted her! Soon Shelby began her daily route to see Benny before he went home for the day.

Meanwhile Rachel sat in rehearsal looking for Miss Corcoran. She needed to make sure that no one was ever going to see her paper other than the teacher. No one could know anything about what had been in her paper, and while she trusted her teacher, she needed her to know how imperative it was for it to remain secret. "Hey Brody?" Rachel called. "Where's Miss Corcoran?"

"Oh she's probably in her boyfriend's class. She always goes to say goodbye to him before practice officially starts."

"Where is his room?"

"A206."

"Thank you so much!" Rachel called already half way out of the theatre. She saw Miss Corcoran ahead of her but something about the woman's posture and the fact that she did not respond when called to, told Rachel that she should just follow quietly. Well actually it said that she should leave her alone but the girl opted to follow instead.

Shelby made her way to Benny's office, tears streaming down her face as she clutched the paper in her hands as if it was keeping her tied to the earth. "She's orphaned." She sobbed as soon as she walked in.

"What?"

"Rachel…. she's in the system. She's orphaned." Rachel froze. Why was Miss Corcoran talking about her? Why was she crying.

"This is great! You can get her back!"

_Get me back?_

"But she's suffering. I would much rather not get her back and her stay with two loving parents than her to be suffering the way she is."

_Is- Is she m-my- NO RACHEL! Stop thinking like that!_

"Well we can make her stop suffering." He rubbed his hands up and down Shelby's arms as she stared off, lost in her own thoughts.

"What if she hates me? What if she doesn't want me to be her mom?" The look of fear and vulnerability broke Benny's heart and he drew the love of his life into his arms, placing kisses to her head.

"Baby, I don't think she'll hate you. You're her mother. Just give her a chance to give you one."

_She is! She's really my mom! But dad and daddy said-_

"Are you ok with it? I mean whether you are or not, I'm doing it. I just don't want to bring her into our home just for you to leave."

"God, Shelby. Yes I want her! I'll be more than happy, honored even, if you would let me be the father figure to her. I love her as if she is mine, already."

"I just want her so bad. Ever since I heard her first heartbeat, all I've wanted to do was hold her and love her and make everything ok for her and I can do that now! WE can do that now." She untucked her head from under his chin and looked up at him, smiling brightly, but he was staring past her. She followed his gaze.

"Y-you wanted me?" the stunned girl asked.

"Rachel?" Shelby disentangled herself from Benny and walked over to the girl.

"You're my mom?" Shelby nodded. "And you wanted me?"

"Every day of your life."

**A/N: Hope you liked! Please review!**

**Lizzy**

**Please Review**


	6. Chapter 6

**So this is in Shelby's pov:**

**"_Y-you wanted me?" the stunned girl asked._**

**"_Rachel?" Shelby disentangled herself from Benny and walked over to the girl._**

**"_You're my mom?" Shelby nodded. "And you wanted me?"_**

**"_Every day of your life."_**

I tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear but she still remained silent, staring at me and yet not really looking at me. "Baby, please say something," I whispered, fear making tears well up in my eyes.

Suddenly she looked straight into my eyes, "Do you still want me?" I laughed with relief and pulled her into my arms.

"Of course I do!" I reveled in the feel of her arms gripping my waist tight as she hugged me back. "And I'm going to get you out of that hell-hole of a foster home."

She froze in my arms. "Y-you know about that?" she whimpered.

"Yes baby, but I swear I didn't know about it until this morning." She just burst into tears then and clung to me like there was no tomorrow. "Sweetheart don't cry."

"It's just I've waited for you for so long and now I finally have you." her arms grew impossibly tighter around me as she spoke.

"Honey, there is no need to worry. I'm here," I whispered into her ear as she turned her face to rest in the crook of my neck and her arms relaxed a little of their grip.

"D-do I h-have t-to go b-back tonight?" she stuttered and my heart clenched.

"I'm afraid so sweetheart," I whispered into her hair. "I can't risk losing you. If I take you now, they may not let me have you, but I am going to my lawyer tomorrow and you will be at my house by tomorrow night I swear."

"Miss Corcoran?" Brody came to a skidding stop as he saw the sight before him. "Rachel. Are you ok?"

She nodded but held on to me.

"Brody, you can tell all of the VA kids to go home," I whispered trying to keep my tears at bay.

"Ummm…. Ok. Rachel call me later ok?" he asked and bravely kissed her forehead before leaving.

"You never cancel practice," she whispered into my neck.

"I know but we have a few things to discuss before you go back don't you think?" I asked running my fingers through her hair.

"Yeah."

"Do you want me to leave, Shell?" Benny asked as he stood nervously off to the side. Rachel picked her head up and looked at him curiously.

"Rachel this is my boyfriend, Benny. Benny this is Rachel," I stated, initiating the introduction that was way overdue. They shook hands gently and she quickly wrapped her arms back around me. I nodded my head gently to him, "But stay, I'll need you to drive me." he walked out of the room. "Do you have any questions?" I asked, not wanting her to feel as if I was hiding things from her.

"Only like a million, but none that I want to ask right now," she whispered. "Except…. I'm going to live with you now right?" I threw my head back and laughed at the absurdity of the question.

"Of course!"

"Is Mr. Benny going to live there too?"

"He already does, but if it would make you uncomfortable we can lo-"

"You would give up living with your boyfriend for me?" she asked.

"Yes."

"But don't you love him?" she looked at me confusedly. Had no one ever put this girl first?

"Yes, I love him to death, but you are my daughter. The love I have for you is much different."

"Well if you're comfortable with him, I can grow to like him." I heaved a sigh of relief. I would have, as I promised, moved out had she wished, but that didn't mean I necessarily wanted to.

"You'll love him Rachel! I just know it!" I nearly squealed, shocking myself at just how excited I really was.

Rachel smiled gleefully, that is until she saw the clock. "Oh! I had better go!" she exclaimed.

I quickly grabbed her phone and typed in my name and phone number. "I promise to get you out. Tonight is your last night there, I swear, but if you need me, you have my number. Are you going to be ok?"

"I'll be fine! Bye!" she called as she ran for the door. Suddenly, though she stopped and turned to me looking as if she really wanted to ask something.

"Did you need something?" I asked sweetly.

"Can I have another hug?" she asked and we both slammed into each other laughing slightly at the impact.

"Anytime," I whispered into her ear.

As soon as Rachel was out the door, Benny was in. I ran up to him, jumping up and wrapping my legs around his waist as I assaulted his mouth with mine. "She's mine!" I exclaimed happily.

Lying in his arms that night I felt complete, even though I was slightly worried about Rachel. Something in the pit of my stomach was slightly off, but I brushed it aside. She hadn't called me, she would be fine.

"You're so beautiful when you're excited," Benny whispered as he brushed a strand of my hair off of my cheek with the back of his hand.

I laughed softly, "You say that about every mood I'm ever in."

"I can't help the truth," he stated cheesily and I snuggled deeper into his chest as his arms tightened around me.

Just when I was on the brink of sleep, the doorbell rang, jolting us both out of our blissful semi-consciousness. Groaning, I got out of bed and walked down the stairs. Turning on the porch light, I opened the door hesitantly before throwing it open as I saw who was standing on my doorstep:

A dirty and slightly bloodied Rachel, and a very pissed off and worried Brody.

"Mom? I know you aren't ready for me yet, but I couldn't stay there, and Brody helped me get here." Suddenly, she had thrown herself into my arms, sobbing into my neck as I rocked and shushed her, whispering soft assurances into her ear as Brody stood off to the side.

"Hey…. Shell who is it? Rachel? What the hell?" He asked successively as he put the pieces of the scene before him together. "I'll kill the bastard!" he spat rushing forward and trying to maneuver his way around us as we took up the doorway. Rachel shuddered against me and my grip tightened.

"No, Benny, it will just make things worse. Believe me I want to hurt the man as much as you do, but we have to take care of this legally, so we won't lose her." She clung tighter to me and I absentmindedly kissed her head, steeling as I felt her do the same, right before she sobbed ever harder into my arms. "Brody, come in," I told the boy as he tried to sneak down the stairs.

"I-I was just going to let you guys have your time."

"Bull, you're staying here so I make sure that you don't kill the man. Upstairs second door on the right, that's where you will stay. There are some VA warm-ups in there that I haven't put up yet, wear a pair of those, now go."

"Yes ma'am," he grumbled as he passed me.

I maneuvered her into the house and Benny shut the door before coming up to us and rubbing soft circles on her back. "What happened, sweetheart?" I asked as I took in the blood all over her clothes.

"I-I can't t-talk ab-bout it."

"Baby, I need to know."

"Hey," Benny's soft voice cooed as he leaned down to be face to face with her. "How about you take a shower and then you can go to bed and we talk about it in the morning?" She nodded and I led her to my bathroom. When she was done, I handed her a pair of my pajamas, figuring that they would be ok for tonight, even if they were a little big. After tucking her in, I walked back into my room, lying down to process what had just happen. That lasted all of twenty minutes before I heard her screaming,

"Mom! Momma!" her voice frightened me as its shrill tone hit my ear.

I rushed into the room and pulled her to me as she awoke, tears streaming down her face. "Please tell me what happened, baby. Please," I begged, but to no avail.

"I can't. I can't. Not now." She repeated over and over again, as I rocked her back and forth.

"Ok," a kiss to her head, "You don't have to say anything right now," another one. Then with a burst of maternal instinct, I began to sing the lullaby I had written her a long time ago,

_My darling angel_

_Though you sleep miles away_

_And I can't see your face_

_Know that I love you _

_Watch for me and see me in every kind stranger_

_Every kind face_

_My darling angel_

_My darling angel_

_I love you my darling angel_

_So please fly home_

**A/N: So I hope you liked this :)**

**Lizzy**

**PLEASE REVIEW**


	7. Chapter 7

Rachel finally stopped crying a few minutes later. She sat wrapped in my arms for a few minutes before looking up at me and moving away. "You can go back to your room now. I'm fine thank you."

"Rachel I really think we need to-"

"I am fine, Miss Corcoran, goodnight," her tone was soft but her words cut through me like a knife.

"Ok, goodnight. I love you." I put on my best show face and walked out of the room and into my own. Quickly slipping off my pants (I never liked sleeping in pants), I crawled into bed and snuggled into my already sleeping boyfriend's chest. He shifted in his sleep, bringing his arms around me and brushing his lips over the top of my head. I let a few tears fall down my cheeks before I finally fell asleep.

Waking up in the morning was, to put it nicely, hell. I hadn't fallen asleep until three and here just two short hours after that I was attempting to get up. I was not going to work and that was clear. "Are you and Rachel staying home for the day?" Benny asked into my ear as I still lie in bed even though he had had enough time to get completely dressed and ready for work.

"Mmm," I grunted in response making him laugh. He kissed my cheek in goodbye stating that Brody had already left and that Rachel was still in bed. "mlovyoo," I whispered, already falling back to sleep. He brushed the hair out of my face, planting another sweet kiss to my head mumbling that he loved me too into my ear before walking off. Smiling I slipped into a peaceful dream state.

Waking up in a much better mood around ten, I smiled as I stretched and made my way to my daughter's room (after putting on pants of course). But what awaited me when I reached her room was emptiness. Her bed was made perfectly and she was gone. I looked all around the house to no avail. Tears of panic sprang into my eyes as I dialed Benny's number. "I've lost her!" I screamed into the phone, out and out bawling. "I can't find her!"

"Calm down, Shell. Did you look outside?" I had just finished throwing on some sweats and tennis shoes, ready to go searching heaven and hell for my little girl when he asked this.

Quickly I checked out there calling her name four times. "No Benny! She's not there!" I cried.

"Ok, Shell, I'll come and get you and we can go look for h- Wait Shelby she's here. I just saw her walk down the hallway."

"At the school?" I asked, dumbfounded.

"Yes, I'll go get her a-"

"No Benny, I will come get her," I sighed, relief washing over me.

"Ok, well I have to get back to class. I love you."

"Love you too."

I rushed out the door and to the school not really caring what I looked like. I wasn't there as a teacher that day, I was there as a mom. Rushing into the school, I went to the front desk and asked the very shocked receptionist to please call down for Rachel to check out. The receptionist, having always been afraid of me, did as asked without further questions. I thanked the woman and stepped out of the office to wait on my daughter.

She came down the hallway five minutes later, and as soon as she saw me her eyes got wide. "I'm so sorry mom!" she squeaked. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her head.

"Oh thank God you're ok. Baby, please don't ever do that to me again. I had no idea where you were. I was so scared."

"Wait," she stated pulling away from me. "You aren't mad?" she asked shifting away from me and down casting her eyes.

"About what?" I asked slightly confused.

"I slept in and missed first period. I didn't mean to I swear! I'm so sorry."

"Rachel there is nothing to be sorry about. I mean I'm a little upset that you left the house without me knowing but right now I'm just relieved that you're ok. I was going to keep you home from school today anyway. We need to talk and I just wanted to spend some time with you."

"You aren't mad?"

"No silly."

"Not even that I messed up your plans?"

"You haven't messed them up. We my dear are going home. We have to- or well I have to take a shower and get dressed. My lawyer and the police are coming to take your statement about what went on last night." She tensed and I placed a soothing hand on her back as I led her out of the school. Then you and I are going to get into our pajamas and watch movies and talk if you want, until Ben comes home and then we'll eat dinner and watch some more. Does that sound ok?"

"That sounds nice," she smiled up at me and I instantly knew that it was my goal in life to make sure that, that smile stayed on her face for the rest of her life.

**Shelby's POV:**

Shortly after I had finished doing my make-up under the watchful eye of Rachel, the doorbell rang. Opening it I found the police officers on the other side.

"Morning ma'am. We're looking for a Shelby Corcoran and Rachel Berry."

"Yes, I'm Shelby Corcoran and this is Rachel." The officer smiled at her and then turned back to his paper.

"As it says here Miss Berry came to your house last night slightly bloodied. Is that correct?"

"Yes sir."

"Well we will need to talk to you, Miss Berry to get your statement." The officer looked at Rachel then and her gaze downshifted.

"Yes sir," was her meek reply as I lead them in and to the living room.

"Now Rachel, we need the whole story," the officer began as we all got settled.

**Rachel's POV:**

The whole story? I thought to myself. "Um, with Mr. Johnson?" The officer nodded. I sighed. I didn't want to talk about the past I only wanted to go into the future. The future with my mom. At least until she tires of me too. "Well he would always punish me for being late by sending me to bed without dinner or without dinner and breakfast the next day but yesterday he was furious. He had specifically told me that I couldn't go to practice but I went anyway. VA was the first place I had felt at home and accepted in a long time. So I went and that's when I found my mo- Miss Corcoran. That was when I found out that she was my mother. Then we talked for a while and I didn't get home until seven. Mr. Johnson was livid. He sent me to my room stating that I better eat good lunches because I wasn't having any other meal for the rest of the week. I heard him shouting downstairs with Mrs. Johnson and then I heard a smack followed by the setting of the table and then by footsteps on the stairs. He burst into my room saying that dinner was ready. I was really confused but as soon as I walked downstairs, I wasn't anymore. On the place that was set for me was a plate that was full of rare almost raw meat. I started to go back upstairs but he yelled at me to sit down. I did so and he told me to eat up. I refused and he shoved the plate closer to me, only it fell off of the table and into my lap, which is why I was covered in blood. I screamed and ran out the door and sprinted until I came to a gas station with a pay phone. Lucky that I just so happened to have enough change in my pocket for the phone, I racked my brain for Miss Corcoran's number. I couldn't remember it though and I had left my phone, which was the reason for the payphone, back at the Johnson's house. But I could remember Brody's, that's my friend, number. I called him and asked him to bring me here and he did." The police officer finished his note taking and asked a few more questions before he left, only to be replaced five minutes later with mom's attorney. He informed her of her legal rights to get me back and had her sign the forms that would begin the transfer of custody from the state to her. After the door shut behind the lawyer, she turned to me and smiled that sweet motherly smile that she always gives me, and I wanted nothing more than to jump in her arms and just have her hold me. I didn't want to smother her though. She is the first person in the last nine years to actually care for me, I didn't want to scare her away. So I just waited for her to say something.

"Do you want to go change and I'll pop us some popcorn and set up a movie?" I nodded my head and began my trek up the stairs to my ro- the guest room. When I had finished changing I walked down the stairs and sat on the far right hand side of the couch and watched as my mother went about setting the movie up.

My mother. The phrase sounded so strange on my mind's tongue. My mother. I have a mother and she is no longer just a figment of my imagination. She's real. Right here with me. Wanting me….. at least for the moment. I sigh and will back the tears threatening to spill out my eyes. Why would she want me? Sure she seems like she does now? But what about when the new wears off? Then I'll just be kicked to the side and I'll be orphaned again. I can't help the single tear that falls down my cheek and of course that's the moment that she turned and looked at me.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" she asks as she sits next to me, but I quickly scoot farther away from her to keep myself from falling into her warm embrace. I see a flash of hurt cross her face but it is gone as soon as it came. "Rachel, I think we need to talk about all of this." Her voice was sweet but there was a hint of authority in it.

"Can we just watch the movie?"

"No, we need to talk and then we can watch the movie."

"But I don't want to talk," I snap. Then as a wave of anger floods my body, I jump up and pace the room while venting every last thought going through my mind, trying to sort through them out loud and paying no heed that they might hurt her. "I don't want to talk to a woman I just met. You are my mother but you aren't my mom… not yet and maybe not ever! You say that you care about me, and maybe you do but that will go away. You're nice now. But that too will go. I know! I've seen it! And how can you love me? Huh? You don't even know me! I mean sure I love you but you're my mom I'm supposed to love you. There is no contract stating that parents have to love their children. I mean you gave me away when I was barely two minutes old. You didn't even want to hold me! My dads said that I cried in the room and reached for you but you wouldn't take me, not even for a moment. They said that you told them to take me and never talk to you again! What's changed? What, in the last thirteen years has made you all of a sudden want to be a part of my life? I just…. I'm tired of everyone thinking of themselves. I know it's selfish but I want someone to think about me for a change! So, Shelby, what about me? Why don't you think about what's going to happen to me when you decide that you've had enough? You want to know what's going to happen to me? I'm going to be handed back over to the state and they are going to keep bouncing me from house to house. Some families are nice but some are horrid. Did you know, at one house I wasn't allowed to take a shower but every three days? Three days. Do you know how much I was made fun of because I stunk? And I cried to you every night. I had a picture of you looking out a window from behind that I found a long time ago. I kept it under my pillow and I talked to you and cried to you every night…. And I begged you to come get me. Now that I have you here with me though, I can't help but think that when I go back I won't have that hope anymore. I really will be all alone. I-" I couldn't finish my sentence as I finally stopped my pacing and looked at her. She was sobbing into her hands. She was so broken, and I had been the one to break her. My heart collapsed under the guilt and I struggled to keep my voice even as tears streamed down my face. "I-I'm so sorry." I ran up the stairs faster than lightning and threw myself onto my bed sobbing over everything I had just said and the fact that I had broken my mother's heart. "Why did I do that? I'm so freaking dumb! Now she really will hate me!" I yelled at myself.

I had been crying so hard that I didn't even hear my door open. I jumped a little bit when I felt her fingers run through my hair but didn't pull away. Slowly, she lay down behind me, curling her body around mine and pulling my small frame back into hers, kissing the back of my head. "I do love you," she whispered but I could still hear the tears in her voice. "Contractual obligation or not, I love you. I would do anything for you. I will never….. never get tired of you. The rest of what you just said, we will talk about later but right now, just tell me what you want me to do and I will do it. Please, baby. Talk to me."

"Can- Can you please just hold me? Please?" I whimpered, and her arms tightened around me as I turned into her chest and cried, feeling her tears hit the top of my head and reveling in the soft kisses she kept placing there.

"Of course."

**A/N: Ok so I hope that you guys liked this chapter :) Please let me know what you think.**

**Lizzy**

**PLEASE REVIEW**

**HAPPY THANKSGIVING! (to anyone who celebrates)**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hey guys! Thank you so much for reviewing and telling me what you think! I hope you guys are enjoying this as much as I am writing it! **

**Oh and I wrote a pre-FMWTY one-shot called "The Park" please… if you have time, go look it up!**

**Anywho on with the story!**

* * *

"Can- Can you please just hold me? Please?" I wrapped my arms around her and smiled through my tears as she turned and clung to me.

"Of course," I whispered, dropping a kiss to her hair. I was so elated to be holding her in my arms that I almost forgot what she had said earlier. Almost. In the back of my head, I was fuming. How could those bastards feed my daughter such lies? I had to set the record straight but I just didn't know how. So I settled for holding my daughter to my chest and doing the one thing she had asked me to do… hold her.

We lay like that for who knows how long before her stomach gave a grumble. Both of us laughed. I kissed her head before asking if she was hungry. She nodded but told me it was no problem. "Baby, if you're hungry, let's go get something to eat."

We got up and I made her some pancakes (nice and meat free just in case there was any residual ill-will from the day before).

After we had finished eating she looked up at me, "Can we watch that movie now?"

"Of course!"

I sat on the couch and hit the play button. It would be the understatement of the century to say that I was surprised when she snuggled into my side, practically sitting on top of me, but that didn't take away from the thrill of it. I smiled and kissed her head for nearly the millionth time in the last hour. Halfway during the movie she looked up at me, "What if Mr. Benny doesn't like me?"

I laughed loudly. "Baby, he's loved you since the day he found out about you."

"You told him about me?" she asked sitting up and turning to me smiling.

"Of course I did!"

"Did you want to…. Tell him I mean?"

"Honestly?" I wanted us to be one-hundred percent honest with each other. "No. I didn't. But not because I was ashamed of you. I am not ashamed of you. I just I didn't know what he was going to think of me for going through with it. I already beat myself up about it nearly every day of my life since I had done it. He, unknowingly so, was my rock. I didn't think I would be able to carry on if he found out and left me. But then I felt guilty for keeping him in a dishonest relationship. I- I wouldn't have been able to make it if he left me…. so in a fit of selfishness, I tried to run away. I packed all my stuff, left a tearstained note and left for the train station."

"So what happened?" she asked, obviously very intrigued in my story.

"He found me. He got home five minutes after I left, read the note and…. Well he just knew me. He knew I would be going to New York. That's where I always go when I'm upset and he knew that. So he bought the last ticket left on the red-eye there and it just so happened to be next to me. He told me he loved me just the same and brought me home. We talked about all of it when we got home and he told me that he loved you too."

"But he'd never met me and he hadn't fathered me."

"That's what I said, but he said it didn't matter. You were part of me and I loved you….. so he did too."

"That doesn't make any sense," she stated her face screwing up in confusion.

I brushed a piece of hair behind her ear and pulled her forehead to my lips. "First piece of motherly wisdom from me to you," I whispered, moving her to where I could look her in the eye, "Love doesn't make sense, sweetpea." She cuddled back into my chest and I realized that she had inherited my need for physical affection and that she finally trusted me, even if just a little bit. "What changed?" I whispered more to myself but she heard it.

"Ma'am?"

"Last night you didn't want me to even touch you, even this morning, but now you're cuddling up to me. I don't mind it at all, I love it," I added when she started to pull away, "I just want to know what changed."

"You followed me. I said all of those hurtful things to you. I broke you, though I didn't mean to, I swear… but still… I hurt you, and you came and comforted me. I hurt you, but you still thought of me."

"Forever and ever," I whispered and pulled her ever closer. I kissed her head and ran my fingers through her hair.

Later I asked if she wanted to go take a shower while I got dinner ready so we could have some family time before she had to go to bed. She beamed at the word family and raced to get in the shower. Not ten minutes later, Benny walked in the door.

"Honey! I'm home!" he yelled cheesily and I ran to him giving him a kiss straight on the mouth. It escalated quickly, the two of us only braking apart when air was absolutely necessary. "Wow! What was that for?" he asked with a grin on his face, his hands roaming southward to cup my bottom before I grabbed his wrists with my own.

"No sir, we have a daughter now. No need to traumatize her just yet."

"I hope I don't ever get traumatized," she laughed coming down the stairs, effectively making us jump apart. What she did next surprised us all. She walked straight up to Benny, looked him in the eye as if looking into his soul and then launched herself forward into his arms, wrapping her own around his waist. "Hi," she whispered. I smiled at the unshed tears glistening in his eyes.

He bent over and placed a kiss to her head. "Hi, sweetheart."

* * *

**A/N: Thanks again for reading! Please review or pm me and questions, comments or concerns you have, and I will try to answer them as best as I can! **

**Oh and I might post the next chapter tomorrow if I get enough response. I'm really excited about it but I want to make sure that enough people read it before I'm loading on a new one, haha.**

**Love,**

**Lizzy**

**PLLEAS REVIEW!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Your response was amazing you guys! Thank you soooo much! So as promised here is the next chapter…..**

"Did you see the way that she looked at me?" he asked excitedly as he got dressed for bed.

"Yes," I laughed.

"It's like she really likes me!" I walked up behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist and kissing his shoulder blade before laying my cheek against the skin of his back.

"She was scared that you wouldn't like her," I mumbled into his back.

"Why wouldn't I like her?" I merely shrugged, still holding on to him. After a moment, he turned in my arms and I settled my head against his chest, effectively snuggling my head under his chin. "What's wrong babe?" he asked into my hair.

"I'm so scared," I whispered.

"Scared? Sweetheart, what are you scared of?" silence. "Rachel?" I nodded. "Why are you scared of Rachel?"

"I'm not scared of her. I'm scared of what she thinks of me. Of what she will think of me. I'm scared that I'm going to suck at this whole being a mom thing." My voice grew quieter at the last admission, "I don't want to be like my mother." He kissed my head and pulled me closer.

"You won't be. First of all, you are nothing like her."

"I look just like her, everyone says so," I grumbled.

"But on the inside, you're different. And secondly, you have her mistakes to learn from. What's one thing that your mom didn't do that you wished she would have done?"

"Well, I always wished she would have gone and said goodnight to me. Not tuck me in bed like a child, just at least a goodnight before she went to bed."

"Then go do that," he whispered pulling away.

"No. What if she doesn't want it? I don't want to smother her." I held on tight to him, not letting him escape my grasp.

"That girl looks like you, but she's also like you on the inside. I may not have seen her all that much but I know that she is exactly like you, babe. Now go tell her goodnight. I'll be here when you get back."

Holding the sleeves of my long-sleeved shirt I shuffled to her room. Knocking slightly, I popped my head in. "Rachel?" I whispered into the dark room, not sure if she was awake or not.

She rolled over and looked at me smiling, "Hey mom!"

Her actions encouraged me and I went to sit on her bed.

"I just came in to make sure you were ok….. and all." I began pulling on my sleeves again, not really knowing what I was supposed to be doing.

"I'm fine."

"Ok baby," I got up and kissed her forehead on instinct, completely shocking both of us. "Well goodnight."

"Goodnight, mom… I…..I love you." immediately tears sprang into my eyes. It was the first time that she had told me that she loved me. I sat right back down without thinking and pulled her up into my arms, hugging her close to my body, feeling elated when she returned the hug just as fiercely.

"I love you too, baby. I love you too." I kissed her head and released her. Not being able to resist the urge I tucked her in and kissed her forehead, just because I could. "Oh! I almost forgot! You need to start thinking about what you want for your birthday! You can have anything you want….. well within reason. I have missed out on thirteen years! I know it's only September and your birthday isn't until December 18th but, I mean, this will give you time to think of what you want. You can have one huge present or a bunch of little ones or… whatever, you decide and I will try my best to get it ok?"

"You remembered my birthday?" she whispered so soft that I barely heard it.

"Of course I remember your birthday! Just be thinking about it ok?" she nodded. "Goodnight, honey, I love you."

"Goodnight, love you." I left the door cracked and sprinted to our room, jumping up on it and right on top of Benny.

"So I'm going to guess that it went well?" he asked as I covered his face in kisses.

"So well," I pulled back and smiled at him, still holding his neck in my hands. "She told me she loved me!"

"That's great, babe!" he exclaimed as he wrapped me in his arms.

"Nooooooo! No! Mom! Momma!" my eyes shot open at the first scream and I ran into her room.

I pulled her into my arms and rocked her back and forth as I ran my fingers through her hair and whispered into her ear. "Everything is ok sweetheart. I'm here. I've got you, babe. Shhhh…. It's ok baby."

"He… he…." She dissolved into tears again and tried her hardest to get closer to me, but she was already as close as could be. "Please, don't let him hurt me," she whimpered.

"Who?" I whispered in her ear. Sure I was going to protect her, I just had to know who I was protecting her from.

She shook her head and cuddled ever closer to me. Twenty minutes later she pulled away. I got up, ready to go like she had told me to last time but her hand shot out and grabbed mine. "Can you lay with me please?" she asked and I didn't respond. I crawled under the covers with her and wrapped my arms around her as she curled into my chest.

"Baby, who did you have the nightmare about? Mr. Johnson?" she shook her head. "Then who?" she shook her head again.

"I can't."

"Sweetheart, you need to tell me."

"Can we talk about it tomorrow? I promise to tell you but I'm-" she yawned and I couldn't help but think it the cutest thing despite my frustration with her silence. "I'm sleepy."

"I guess so. But we are talking tomorrow, young lady." She nodded and rested her head against my chest. "We're taking another day off tomorrow, so no escaping to school."

"Is that ok? You're going to have to cancel practice again."

"Baby, you're much more important than VA. Besides, they've been practicing all summer they can have a couple of days off."

"Ok," she mumbled softly sighing as she fell asleep. Kissing her head, I too fell asleep. The best sleep I had had in thirteen years.

**A/N: Hey guys! So what did you think? I would love to know!**

**So I'm in a one-shot mood…. So if anyone that has any prompts for a one-shot please just send me the prompt and characters. **

**Lizzie**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I have changed this to M but it isn't crude. Just so you are warned**

The next morning I woke up to find my little girl curled into my chest, playing with the buttons on my night shirt. "Hey sweetpea," I whispered as I stretched the one arm that wasn't wrapped around her above my head.

"Good morning mom."

"Are you hungry?" I asked, not wanting her to have to go without a meal in my house.

"A little, but can we just stay here for a little while?" I nodded and settled back into the pillows, willing to stay for as long as she wanted me to. That didn't last long though. Ten minutes later I was stirring a pan of eggs (as per request from Rachel) and sipping my first cup of coffee.

Later, as we sat on the couch after eating our breakfast I decided that we had waited long enough. "We need to talk Rachel." I watched as she curled into herself slightly, pulling her knees to her chest. Scooting closer to her, I ran my fingers through her hair and kissed her forehead. "Baby, please tell me."

"You'll be so disappointed in me though," she whispered.

"No I won't baby. I'm your mother. I love you. Please tell me baby." I was begging now.

"H-His name was Matthew. He was my foster brother when I was eight. He was the nicest foster brother I had ever had. He would always play with me. One day he suggested that we play a new game. I loved new games, but in this game he said I had to take off my clothes. He said we were playing movie star. I told him that movie stars wear clothes. He laughed and told me that some didn't so I agreed to do it. he…." She paused and I brushed a few tears off of her cheeks as I kissed her forehead again, silently urging her on. "He put me in different positions and took pictures of me. We played that game a lot. I always had a feeling that something was wrong but I trusted him. Then one day when I took off my clothes, he took off his too… he… he said we were playing a different game that day. Mommy it hurt so bad. I'm so sorry I didn't know what I was doing anything wrong! I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." her sobs broke my heart and I pulled her to my chest shushing and rocking her back and forth.

"Baby, it's not your fault. It's not your fault." Somehow she had ended up in my lap and we stayed like that for hours. When she had finished crying she looked up at me with pitiful eyes.

"Do you hate me?"

"No. I could never hate you for what that bastard did to you. Thank you for telling me…" she could sense that there was something else I wanted to ask and promptly told me she would tell me anything.

"Did you ever tell anyone?"

"No. I had a friend, Quinn, she was also living there with me. he said that if I told he would do it to her. I didn't want my friend to get hurt."

"Oh." That was all I could say. I was astonished by the bravery and loyalty my little girl had, no matter how bad it had turned out for her. After a couple of moments I pulled back, running my fingers through her hair. "To clear things up about something you said yesterday, I always wanted you, sweetheart. Always." She smiled the brightest smile I had ever seen on her face and cuddled into my chest. "You know what?" I called out randomly. She shook her head. "We need to go get you some clothes! Do you feel up to some retail therapy?"

* * *

Six hours later we trudged into the house loaded down with five hundred dollars' worth of clothes, music, room décor, and paint. "Thank you so much momma! You really didn't have to get me all of this."

"Oh but I did! We need to make your room… your room." I took the paint and sat it in the corner. "Maybe we can trick your father into staying home with us tomorrow and help to paint so you'll have your room done by the weekend."

"What did you say?" she asked softly. My back turned towards her, I didn't see that her mouth was agape and that she had stopped in her tracks.

"Well I figured that we've missed the last two days and tomorrow is friday, what's one more? And your fa-" I caught my blunder the second time around. Turning to her my hand flew to cover my mouth. "Baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to… I just….. I'm sorry."

Her face was frozen and I could see the wheels turning in her head. "It's ok…. I mean I'm not ready to call him dad or anything, I hardly know him, and yet still I kind of see him as that. Do you think he'd want to be my dad?" I nodded emphatically, not being able to speak.

I helped her to hang up her clothes and before we knew it, Benny's car was pulling up in the drive. Looking at the clock, I became worried, he was two hours early. We ran down the stair to meet him but he brushed past us. Rachel looked at me questioningly, but I quickly excused myself and followed him into our bedroom.

I walked in just in time to see the vase that his brother and sister-in-law had given us last year for Christmas, fly across the room and smash into a pile of broken glass. Benny then flew after it and crumpled in a heap on the floor, trying futilely to put the pieces back together. "Benny? What's wrong?" I asked as I came up behind him. He continued his actions until I took his cut up hands in my own, cutting them in the process but I didn't care, all that mattered was him. "Babe, what's wrong?" the tears in my eyes were threatening to overflow. I was frightened of his anger and yet my heart was broken for the sorrow I saw in his eyes.

"Jordan…. He died." The next thing I knew, I was cradling his head against my chest as he pulled me closer, fisting his hands in my clothes. My heart broke and I silently began to cry too, as I held _**my **_weeping Benny. I loved his brother as if he was my own, and he had treated me as such. He and his wife, Tyra, had been the only people his family to look past my skin color and accept me. The four of us were incredibly close. Jordan and Tyra's kids had even taken to calling me Aunt Shell. And now he was gone, just like that. I wanted to know what happened, but for the time being, I would just have to hold him and comfort him as he had done for me many times before.

"Mom?" came a soft whisper from the door where Rachel was standing looking at us in confusion. Benny immediately sat up and tried to wipe the tears off his face, being ever prideful. Rachel walked slowly to us, getting on her knees and shuffling to Benny's side. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close to her. "It's ok to cry. We're family. I won't criticize you for it."

He wrapped one arm tight around her and reached the other one out for me, taking comfort in having his family close.

* * *

That night as I lay in bed with his head resting on my chest, his ear over my heart, I softly asked when the funeral was.

"Sunday." I kissed his head and ran my hands down his back soothingly. "Will you go with me?" the vulnerability in his voice startled me. He was such a strong man who would have normally thought such statements a sign of weakness.

"Of course."

"Can…. You… well cou…"

"What? Babe, anything. What is it?" I whispered into his ear.

"Can we-" he lifted his head and made eye-contact with me. He didn't need to say anymore. I connected my mouth to his giving him my consent. Telling him that I was his, to do with as he will. He needed me. Needed my body to prove to himself that he was alive. That I was alive. Most would call it pity sex, but that was the farthest from the truth. It was me, allowing him to allow me to comfort him.

He kissed my lips and lay me back into the pillows after he had removed my shirt and panties. I pulled his boxers as far down his body as I could as I stroked his tongue with my own. My hands ran down his body slowly, comfortingly. His though, searched my body, running over every crevice, every curve, as if committing me to his memory.

There was no foreplay. He kissed the sensitive flesh connecting my neck and shoulder as he entered me and I sighed softly.

Tears streamed down his face the entire time that we were joined, and when we reached our peak, he collapsed on top of me. He flipped us over and pulled me on top of him, his tears gone. He kissed my head and whispered, "I just needed to feel close to you."

"I know," I whispered placing a kiss to his chest and placing my ear over his heart.

"I love you," he choked on the last word making my heart ache.

"I love you too," another kiss and soon we were both asleep.

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**A/N: So sorry it took so long to get this up I've had a terribly busy week. Anywho… please tell me what you think. PLEASE!**

**Lizzie**

**PLEASE REVIEW**


	11. Chapter 11

My phone rang rather loudly, the sound emanating throughout the room. I lunged for it to silence it before it woke Benny. Pulling on my robe, I walked out of the room and to the living room before calling back my big sister. It was no use though as there was a soft knocking on the front door. I opened the door and had no time to say or do anything before her arms were wrapped solidly around me.

"Shelby?" there was worry in her voice as she embraced me.

"What is it Marie? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, baby, I came by to make sure that you were ok." She gently tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. "I just saw the news… Jordan…. I know you guys were close. How's Benny?" she looked in the direction of my bedroom.

"He's doing fine. He actually cried and let it all out."

"He did?" she asked, also astonished at his openness.

"Yeah. I don't know how she did it. She just walked in, hugged him and told him that we were his family and that there was no shame in crying in front of us."

"Who's she?" My sister asked clearly confused.

"Rachel…." Suddenly it hit me. I had been so caught up in getting my daughter back and acclimating her to my home that I had forgotten to call my sister, the one who stuck by me the whole time that I was recovering from the pregnancy, the one who came to my house when I needed her just to hold me and give empty promises that everything would be alright.

"Rachel… Berry?" she was shocked and I could see the hurt and slight amount of anger on her face.

"Yes, Marie, I'm so sorry. I know that's not enough but I'm so sorry. Things have been so hectic. I found her and then she was being abused so I had to be careful about getting her. Then she just showed up here, terrified. Then I thought she ran away. And then Jordan and I-" she engulfed me in a huge hug.

"I'm not going to lie to you and say that I'm not upset that you didn't tell me, but it seems like you've been through a lot this week."

"I have," I whispered into her shoulder, holding on tight to her. She kissed my head and rubbed my back soothingly. Later I pulled away from her slightly to look up into her face. I can't begin to describe the love I had for this woman. She was my rock when no one was there. When my family decided that they didn't want to be associated with a "cash whore", she was the only one who stood by me. I was four months pregnant at the time and twenty. Ever since then, she has been like a mother to me, only closer. It wasn't awkward for us to talk about touchy subjects like doctors and our sex lives around each other because we had always been really open. Now, though, she was the one who held me when I cried, who threatened Benny within an inch of his life if he ever hurt me, and who would walk me down the aisle whenever that time came. "Do you want to see her? She's asleep but I go in there and watch her sometimes just to prove to myself she's real."

"Sure, sweetheart." I lead her up the stairs and to Rachel's room. Opening the door we snuck up to the bed. "God, Shelby, she's beautiful." I beamed with pride.

"Thank you."

"Mama….." we both looked at her stunned into silence with the fear that we had woken her. "No… mama please! Please don't leave me…. please!" I sat down on her bed and smoothed her hair back, leaning forward and kissing her forehead before laying my cheek against it.

"Shhhh…. Sweetheart I'm not going anywhere." She mumbled something and turned over. I stood and ushered Marie out of the room and back down the stairs. "I'm terrified," I whispered as I sunk into the couch and buried my face in my hands.

"Well from what I can see, you are doing a wonderful job," she sat beside me and pulled me into her chest as she leaned back into the couch. I cuddled close to my sister and realized just how much of a mother she really was to me, and she was only eight years older than me. "And, apparently, she likes Benny."

"Yeah," I smiled, "she does." I tried to stifle a yawn.

"Go to sleep, Shelby. I'll be here when you wake up."

"But you didn't come here for me to literally fall asleep _on _you."

"Go to sleep," she whispered and I went silent for a moment."

"Isn't she beautiful, Mar?" I asked quietly as I cuddled further into her chest.

"Yes, she is, baby." She placed a kiss to my forehead and held me closer.

"Mar?" she hummed her response and I knew I had to ask quickly lest she fall asleep. "Will you please sing to me?"

She chuckled. "Shell, you definitely have the better of our two voices, why must you insist upon my singing to you?"

"I-I don't know it's just that…. Oh I'm sorry. I'm acting like a child." I began to pull away but she just pulled me right back into her and began to sing the song our grandmother used to sing to us when we were little.

"_Erev shel shoshanim_

_Ney tse nael habus tan_

_Mor bes amim…."_

Her message was clear. I would never be too old for this.

**A/N: I know that it is cruel of me to make you wait this long and then give you such a short chapter but all I can say is that I am sorry and needed this space to establish the sisterly bond. Also I'm sort of stuck so if anyone has any ideas don't hesitate to give them.**

**So what did you think of Marie? I really like her. I don't have a big sister but if I did I would want her to be like this. A sort of best friend/ mother. Pretty much I just wish I had someone older than me who I could be really close with….. anywho enough of this pity party!**

**Oh you should also looke up Erev Shel Shoshanim. I know it's a choir piece but the alto part sounds like a lullaby.**

**Lizzy**

**PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW**


	12. Chapter 12

"Mom…. Mooooommmmm…. Momma," my daughter's voiced served as the sweetest alarm I've ever heard but my mind would not come into the conscious world and I snuggled further into my sisters chest. My sister! Crap! Rachel probably has like fifty million questions going through her head right now and at the top of the list was probably why I was snuggled up with a strange (to her at least) woman on the couch.

"Rachel!" I shot up effectively waking Marie out of her slumber.

"God, Shell, give a girl some warning," she mumbled as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. As she removed her hands from her face though, I saw a look of recognition cross it. "Rachel," she breathed.

"What?" the girl mumbled. "H-how do you know me?"

I saw this as my cue to step in. "Rachel, this is my sister, Marie. Marie, this is Rachel."

"I have an aunt?" she looked at me, slightly dumbfounded. I could only nod.

The three of us sat and talked for a few minutes and just like she had with me, Rachel instantly liked her aunt and they hit it off right away. Soon I was the one left out of the conversation as Marie told Rachel a most embarrassing story from my childhood, much to my dismay. Suddenly my mind drifted to Benny. "I'll be back in a minute," I smiled as I got off the couch.

"Take all the time you need Shell, I'll just tell Rachel here how you used to run around the house naked after your baths until someone…" her voice drifted away as my mind moved to more pressing issues, like how my Benny was doing. I opened the door and stepped in, shutting it softly behind me. I watched as he slept peacefully and prayed that he hadn't woken and needed me at some point during the night. Shedding the robe I crawled into our bed and snuggled up to him, lying my head on his chest and allowing all of his warmth to seep into my body.

"Does she like Marie?" his voice husked.

"Very much. How did you-"

"Your sister is very loud. Do you think we could have her watch Rachel tomorrow?"

"For the funeral? Why? Do you not want her there?"

His fingers threaded through my hair as he spoke. "It' not that I don't want her there, it's just, my mom is…. Well you know how she is."

"Yeah," I ran my fingers over his chest to soothe the tension I could feel resonating from it.

"I just don't want her to hurt Rachel…. Dammit Shelby," he took a breath to calm his nerves. "You and Rachel are all I really have in this world. She's like a daughter to me and if that woman hurts her, I will never be able to forgive her."

I placed a kiss to his chest with a mumbled, "I already can't."

"Shelby," he sighed.

"No, Benny!" I exclaimed sitting up and looking down at him. "I refuse to forgive that woman for all that she has done to you. She doesn't like me? Fine! I don't give a crap! But the way she treats you… her son, is unacceptable." I placed my hand on the side of his face. "You, Rachel, and Marie are the only people _**I**_ have and when anyone decides to mess with any of you, they have me to deal with too!"

His hand moved to cup my cheek as well. "My beautiful, strong woman. How did I ever get so lucky?"

"Oh stop being such a sap," I joked and he smiled, still pulling me in for a kiss.

"We need to shower," he stated as he pulled away. "You smell like sex." I instantly froze. Oh no! Did Marie smell it? I turned red at the thought. She may be my sister and we may talk about our sex lives, but that was just a little too much. "I'm sure she did Shell. You know she's never going to let you live it down." I groaned as he pulled me into the bathroom. He situated the water to the perfect temperature and we both stepped in. As soon as the water hit me I was stunned into stillness. The water felt amazing and I pulled Benny to me in a tight embrace as an excuse to just stand under it for a minute longer.

Twenty minutes later I stepped out of my room to hear my daughter's giggle coming from the living room. Walking in, I found the two sitting on the couch playing speed. Rachel, had clearly won the game because my sister was currently ranting on and on about how Rachel must have cheated. "Right because no one's ever beat you before, right Mar?"

"Shut up!"

"So harsh, too!" I laughed, going to kiss my daughter on the cheek. "I hope you haven't been so harsh to my darling angel."

"Darling angel my foot!" I merely laughed.

"Rachel, baby, why don't you go take a shower? "

"Ok, fine…. I guess….. If I muuuussst…." She sighs dramatically and I know that she wants to stay down here with us.

"Go!" I laugh so she knows I'm not mad but that she does need to go.

As soon as she was out of earshot Marie turned to me with a very knowing smile. "Rendevous in the shower?"

"What? No! Don't be disgusting!"

"What's disgusting is you lying on me in the condition you were."

"You know you didn't mind otherwise you would have said something before."

"I guess that's true. You are my little sister," she kissed my forehead and brushed my hair off of my cheek, looking intently into my eyes before asking her next question. "How is everyone this morning?"

I chuckled harshly and leaned back into the couch, propping my feet on the coffee table. "You mean Benny?"

"Yes, and you."

"We're fine. We've been through a lot before. We'll be fine. But will you watch Rachel on Sunday? Benny doesn't want her to go to the funeral for fear of what is mother will say, and he just doesn't want to deal with that."

"And how do you feel about it?" she asked, threading her fingers through mine and leaning back into the couch as she snuggled closer to me, trying to comfort me in the only way she knew how.

"Do I want her to go? Yes and no. I do because I don't want her to feel as if she is not part of this family but I don't because… well all of my attention needs to be on Benny and how to make him feel comfortable… not on strangling the woman because you know that she is going to say something and when she does, I'm going to have to hold back myself as well as Benny. He's grown so protective over her."

"Yes, by the way, I will watch Rachel for you. We'll have lots of fun."

"Somehow that worries me," I mumbled slightly as she chuckled darkly. Oh yes. I was definitely worried.

**A/N: Sorry it took so long. I've been sooooooo busy, I'm surprised I have this now.**

**Please, I beg of you, to please review. I want to know your thoughts, just please, no flames.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


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